Used to, Not Anymore

Have you had experience the life of Christian when you were in the church and decided to quit --- for some reason or you maybe heard the Word of God through preaching or sharing by your Pastor or co-Christian, and feel so difficult to accept the reality when the Pastor from your church preached something that deals about the true living Christian.

Unfortunately, I see myself from those years when I starting out strong in walk with God, but for some reason I started to fade and eventually drop off and quit. I shut off the door of my heart to everyone and to God. It is like when you go for a long race and many runners get weary of waiting for a prize and decide to quit.

I remember back years when I was a backslider; I turned myself away from God for I feel I don’t deserve to be there. There weren't any days that I wasn't miserable person after I quit attending the church that was a big regret I ever made.

During those days - I came to realized that I need that message even it hurts sometimes. And I need God. I need his guidance, I need His Word for I am a lost person--- as part of my study and my journey as Christian. I realized that the life of Christian is not a hundred yard dash, but it is a long-distance race and going to a close relationship with God is total commitment that holds you to eternal life.

There is this verse as says, “When people start rejecting God they need other things to hold life together. For everyone who turns away from God, those other things are but “broken water pots” that don’t hold anything of value.”

As I see this picture, if people believe that the Christian life means having their problems solved immediately, always treated right by people, never having doubts about the future, having prayers always answered within the days expected, and always being treated and entertained by church, then people are running after the wrong prize --- they’ll be disappointed, grow tired and give up.

But I do believe if the goal is simply to know God who always there who created us and loved us to die on a cross to save us from our sin then we’ll never grow weary. I also believe when you in the Word of God there is always something new to discover about the richness and depth of God’s love for us.

One thing I have learned is, “give God permission to change you---focus on how well you are doing and let God to work with you in His perfect time.”

There is this quote from a friend reminding me, says:

“If there was ever a contest to see whether you could sin more than He could forgive, you would lose the contest…He is so rich in forgiveness."

Psalms 103:11 For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy toward them that fear him.

Shaping Your Child with Positive Discipline - Part 2

Good Morning!

The time here in Vancouver, B.C. is 11:09 am, and preparing myself to go out and enjoy the beautiful weather here. Thought before I leave the house, I can post the second half of the article...so here is the second half of it.

Take care everyone and God bless!

"Shaping Your Child with Positive Discipline" (Part 2)



THE EMOTIONS OF DISCIPLINE

Anger is your enemy when disciplining your child. Angry discipline is a roller coaster: it is inconsistent and unpredictable. In fact, anger can lead to all of the negative forms of discipline listed above.

To discipline fairly and properly, draw a consistent line. Before you discipline, show your child the line, and let him know beforehand what behavior crosses over that line. Tell him lovingly what he has to do to stay inside your boundaries.

Children, even young ones, have an uncanny sense of where the line is drawn. Every person who deals with children-parent, teacher, or babysitter-has drawn a line, and the children know exactly where it is.

Imagine a child giving you trouble all night long. Just little things-she refuses to pick up her toys, come to the dinner table on time, clean her plate, or take a bath when she's told. She wants to watch five more minutes of television or run outside for a while.

She has been pushing the line and irritating you the entire evening, and she finally refuses to go to bed. She knows where the line is drawn. She knows she can get away with only so much nonsense before the discipline begins. Children love to push those limits and bump up against that line.

The truth of the matter is, parents can draw a line anywhere they want to.

My wife drew a line with our boys about a block-and-a-half from the house. I drew a line about six inches from their noses. Every parent is different-thank God that we are. Along with consistent discipline, children need to know how to respond appropriately to different kinds of authority. Children need the freedom to explore, and one parent provides that. The other parent may provide the hard line that children will encounter in situations later in life.

Draw the line, but keep in mind that anger hurts more than it helps in discipline.

You may think that anger is the only discipline your child will heed. But remember, anger is not discipline. Anger is vengeful, demeaning, impulsive punishment-not loving discipline.Remind the child of the line he is crossing, and deal with your anger in some other way. Children don't mind making parents angry, but an angry response always results in improper, and often, ineffective discipline.

When I was in school, I had a teacher by the name of Miss Pickford. We loved to make her angry because she would throw a book or an eraser at you. We would go to great lengths, spending recess plotting what we could do to get Miss Pickford to throw an eraser.
In one of his books, Dr. James Dobson tells about another schoolteacher. She was a large woman, and when she got angry, she'd jump on the desk and blow a whistle. Dr. Dobson said her students spent much of the day trying to do things to get her to jump on her desk and blow a whistle.

Children love to move up to that line. But take care with your anger-it can have surprising results. If you think anger equals obedience, you are wrong. For too many parents and teachers, their anger means entertainment for the uncontrolled kids, and very ineffective discipline. You think you got results, but they know they just got a rise out of you.

The time to discipline is before you get angry. Draw your discipline line way ahead of the anger line. If children cross the discipline line, make sure the correction is quick because they will move right on to the anger line. By then, the chances for good discipline are greatly diminished.
Suppose you are at your limit long before they begin to test you. You've had a really bad day, or a stressful situation has put you on the edge. If your anger is immediate, save the discipline for later. Give them a clear warning and a time when the discipline is coming. Whether you need to wait 1 hour or 24 hours, when you are angry, save the discipline for a time when it will be correct and sensible.

THE TOOLS OF DISCIPLINE

There are many tools parents have to use in proper discipline. When you use them, keep in mind that every child is different. A tool that is too weak to mold the will of one child may be strong enough to break the spirit of another. Choose your tools wisely.

One positive form of discipline is encouragement. Words of praise are important in any program of discipline. If your son behaved himself in a situation where he would normally run wild, tell him. If your daughter responded to correction the very first time, thank her.

Make sure your children hear when other parents or kids say something to you about their good behavior. Give them credit for what they have done-don't save the reward for yourself. You may think, "What a wonderful parent I am. I must be doing something right." Pass along the reward to them, "What a wonderful child you are. You must be doing something right!"

Second, you can discipline through rebuke. But rebuke each child in such a way that you don't compare him with his brother, sister, or anyone else. If a school teacher ever compares a child negatively to anybody else, I think that teacher ought to be fired on the spot. Comparisons are deadly to a child's self-esteem.

Third, the Old Testament says discipline with the rod. The New Testament says use a whip. We used a switch when our boys were young, and a belt when they got a little older. Dr. Dobson recommends using a wooden spoon.

The purpose of discipline is to get the child's attention, not to hurt him. Never abuse, shame, or embarrass your child. It may just take a word with one child, and the rod with another. But whatever it takes, get their full attention and let them know clearly, but kindly, the sting of stepping over the line.

How do you shape the will without breaking the spirit? Discipline in the right way at the right time with the right spirit. Consider the personality of each child, and adjust your discipline accordingly.

SAVE THE SELF-IMAGE!

Let me tell you just a few more things about breaking the Spirit. Common sense rules can keep you from making the fatal mistake of damaging your child's emotions. Every child will have damaged emotions in his life; we cannot keep him from it. But keep the pain as far away from your discipline as you can.

Teachers can see things in the classroom that they misjudge. For example, one teacher said that my wife, JoBeth, would have serious social problems all of her life.

You see, JoBeth was born in Laurel, Mississippi. When she moved with her family to Bloomington, Illinois, she brought with her a Southern accent.

On her first report card of first grade, the, teacher wrote a long note to her mother and father. She said, "Throughout her life, your daughter will have serious social problems because she does not relate well to people."

The teacher had no idea what the problem was. This little girl's Southern accent was totally foreign to children in the Midwest. The kids laughed and asked her to say different words to hear how it sounded. So rather than answering the questions the teacher asked her, she just kept quiet. The teacher interpreted this as a social problem. Yes, it was a social problem, but not of the variety this teacher imagined.

We do not forget these events from long ago, do we? My own story comes from the second grade. One day in class, the teacher called a spelling bee. She asked the smartest boy and the smartest girl to choose teams. I was a poor speller, but suddenly I felt smart. I begged to be chosen, but nobody wanted me. Finally, the teacher told one team to take me. Guess who lost the spelling match that day. I don't remember a thing in the world about second grade, not even the name of my teacher, but I remember that spelling bee. That event left a scar.

If events like these can leave a permanent scar on children, be sure that poor discipline can easily do the same. Your children can and will experience emotional pain when they are away from you. That is why, even in discipline, your arms should be a haven of safety for your child. Don't let the scars come from you. Don't be the one to damage the emotions of your child.

Parents, please realize that some things are more important than academic or athletic achievement. The self-esteem of your child is more important by far. Your children can go through life successfully never knowing the difference between a noun and a verb, but they will never emotionally survive outside your picket fence if their self-image is broken.

Discipline is so necessary, but consider it with care. Do not take it lightly. I can say truthfully that I have never seriously punished any of my children, either with a severe rebuke or with a belt, that I did not leave them and go off by myself and cry. And, I can truthfully say, I have never failed to return after such an experience to give them a hug at the right time. I did not cancel the discipline, apologize for it, or take it back. I just reminded them that I loved them.

Why is that so important? Because God says so. You see, He deals with your sin and with my sin that way. With law, grace, and tears.

God Bless You!

Shaping Your Child with Positive Discipline

What is causing mere children to be a coarse, so brutal? What is happening to our society that kids can be a violent, so callous, so unmindful of right and wrong. Most parent have always complained about the behaviour of their kids. This is maybe the most challenge for all parents how to deal this with their kids---of how to be a parent?

I am not a parent yet, but someday I will. Hmmm...that I don't know when? It maybe gonna take few more years before that happen --- need to marry someone first :) who knows?

As I promised from my last post, here is the article that tells us about "Shaping Your Child with Positive Discipline" . I pray that God will lead all parents to have a righteous relationship with Him, may the Lord will bless your heart.

The article was written by Dr. Ed Young from Second Baptist Church. The article is a little bit long so here is the first part of the article.



"Shaping Your Child with Positive Discipline"

Your first responsibility as a parent is to love God in everything. Children learn by example. They notice what we do and what we believe. Children know what Mom and Dad really love, and they try to attain it for themselves. So a wise father will love the Lord with all his heart, soul, body, mind, and strength. A good mother loves God more dearly than she loves her own family.

Your second responsibility as a parent is to teach your children. If you love God and teach your children well, you will be a successful parent. There is no guarantee that every child will find salvation and learn to love God completely. But if you love God and teach your children fairly, you have done everything a parent can do.

All their lives, your children will know that you truly love God. They will find the lessons you taught them valuable in all they do. How do we teach our children? We teach with words. But words have validity only when they are lived out in action. Unless our lives as parents are compatible with what we seek to teach our children, our teaching will be invalid and ineffective.

If you do not truly love God, do not try to teach your children about loving Him. They will only inherit your hypocrisy. Children will not listen and will not learn if you try to teach them what you yourself do not believe.

EFFECTIVE TEACHING

Hear, O Israel! The LORD is our God, the LORD is one! And you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. And you shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. And you shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates. (Deuteronomy 6:4-9)

Notice the first commandment in this passage. Love the Lord with all you are. That is your first responsibility as a parent. When you do that, effective teaching naturally results in three ways.

First, we can teach our children when we are sitting down. Take the opportunity at the dinner table to share a real blessing with your children. When the entire family is together at the table, read something from the Scriptures and tell them how you have applied it to your life. Start early and your children will learn a love and respect for God's Word.

They will learn a love and respect for you as a parent if you show something of yourself. When you share something real about yourself, your children have a chance to see inside you, to see what makes you work. They learn about the things you truly care about. Our actions sometimes indicate we care more about our work than we really do. Here is your chance to set the record straight. Let them know that they are really more important to you than your work. Work helps you provide for them.

Second, we can teach our children as we are walking. Do things with them. Treat an appointment with your child like an appointment with a dear friend-not something to be postponed at the last minute.

Pastors get plenty of invitations to do things. Some people don't understand when I say I've got an appointment with one of my children. I hear the dangerous words, "Oh, that's just your family. That can be postponed; you spend plenty of time with them." Yes, I do, and l will hopefully spend plenty more time with them. How important are your children to you? As important as a corporate executive? Then treat them like one.

Finally, we can teach our children when we are lying down and rising up. When they go to bed at night, what a wonderful time to pray. With younger children, we can read a Bible story and tell them what it means. Tell your son or daughter what you thought about the first time you heard that story. They love to hear what Mommy and Daddy were like when they were little. At the right time, they will really listen and begin to understand things about God.

This passage also tells us that God's Word should always act as a signpost. For the believer, the Scriptures are a billboard. They stand as a sign over your life, over your home, and over your family. A sign does three important things:

A sign gives information. Signs tell us what to do. They provide instruction, guidance, and fair warning.

A sign carries authority. Signs call us to obey. I saw a "Candid Camera" episode once where the producers had placed a doormat at the entrance to a supermarket. On this doormat in block letters were the words WIPE YOUR FEET. You would be surprised to see how many people stopped and wiped their feet before walking in.

A sign points to the future. Signs tell us what lies ahead. Psalm 59:10 says, "My God in His loving kindness will meet me." I like to paraphrase that verse to say, "God meets us around every corner of life." We labor and toil over so many decisions, but God is there to meet us around the corner of every single one.

This same verse begins, "My God." God is personal. When He is real to you, when you truly love Him, God is your friend. In times of adversity, trial, temptation, fear, and frustration, we can know that God is there. He is already around that comer.

Psalm 59:10 also gives us the good news that even around the corner of death, God will be there.As a parent, you already know it's impossible to go everywhere with your child and to watch everything he or she is doing. But with the words of the Scriptures, you can post signs over their lives. God's Word can leave a calling card in the memory of your children that will stay with them forever-providing information, calling them to obey, and pointing to the future.

LITTLE SAVAGES

Keep in mind that good teaching is not enough. All of us know that every child needs discipline. Every child has a warp and a bent toward evil. If you understand that, you are already a better parent. But it's not only true of your child, it is true of you. Evil is built into all of us. And I believe the secular world has finally come to agree.

Recently, the Minnesota Crime Commission grew concerned about the increase in the rate of crime among teenagers. With secular psychiatrists and psychologists, they conducted a secular study of children. Here is the result:

Every baby starts life as a little savage. He is completely selfish and self-centered. He wants what he wants, when he wants. His bottle. His mother's attention. His playmate's toy. His uncle's watch. Deny him these wants and he seethes with rage and aggressiveness, which would be murderous were he not so helpless. He is dirty. He has no morals, no knowledge, no skills. This means that all children, not just certain children, are born delinquent. If permitted to continue in the self-centered world of infancy, given free rein to his impulsive actions to satisfy his wants, every child would grow up to be a criminal. A thief, a killer, a rapist.

After reading that, you cannot deny that we all need discipline! Proverbs 22:15 says, "Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; the rod of discipline will remove it far from him."
So as a God-fearing parent, you need to understand and to live by God's words on the subject of discipline. Treat your children as God has created them to be treated in discipline, and you cannot go wrong.

GROUND RULES FOR DISCIPLINE

And you have forgotten the exhortation that is addressed to you as sons, My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the LORD, nor faint when you are reproved by Him; For those whom the LORD loves He disciplines, and He scourges every son whom He receives. It is for discipline that you endure: God deals with you as with sons: for what son is there whom his father does not discipline? But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons.

Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live? For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, that we may share His holiness. All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. (Hebrews 12:5-11)

Learning to discipline children is so difficult. How hard and trying it is. You may even think how impossible it is. But don't be discouraged. Many people just like you are wondering how to discipline correctly.

How should you act toward your children when doubt enters your mind about how to deal with them? The Scriptures provide the best examples in the world. Consider the way your heavenly Father deals with you. The way God deals with you is the exact pattern you should follow in dealing and living with your children.

Some people are not so sure this is true. Before you decide, first ask yourself this question: How does God deal with me? His discipline involves a balance between law and grace, and a foundation of love and limits.

What is the purpose of law? The law tells us what God is like. The Ten Commandments tell us of the morality, the expectations, the nature, and the character of God. Later, in the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus elaborates upon the law. The law draws a line around us, showing us how good God really is. It is the external manifestation of goodness.

What is grace? To know grace, combine patience, help, endurance, forgiveness, and sympathy. Grace is the internal working of goodness. Grace grows on the inside.

In God, we see a picture of both law and grace. He always obeys the external restraints of the law, but he moves toward us with His wonderful grace. So as we discipline, God asks us to abide by the law while practicing grace.

Here, discipline becomes difficult. How do you mold the will without breaking the spirit of a child? Once you break a child's spirit, you can spend your life trying to put it back together.
But you have a problem. The will of a child is made out of solid steel. From the very start, they demand attention, they demand food, they demand to be held. They will wear out an army of people. How do you mold solid steel without causing it to snap? It is difficult.

Each of us has damaged emotions. Everyone does. We have feelings of inferiority. We have feelings of inadequacy we carry because somewhere at home, in school, or in the neighborhood, our spirit was broken or harmed.

People who seem to have it all together are most to be pitied. Many boastful, out-going, swashbuckling people have a spirit that's been shattered in a very serious way.
Others respond by becoming introverted and timid; this is a sad response as well. But somehow, somewhere, each of us has been scarred emotionally. And many times, the damage occurs in the realm of discipline.

Here are four principles that will help you know how to discipline your children fairly:

1. Never discipline a child in anger. This is the first and foremost of these guidelines. Continue reading in this booklet, and I will tell you why anger can be so ineffective and so destructive in discipline.

2. Never discipline a child for revenge. Never take your pound of flesh from a child. You may have warned and threatened him dozens of times, but when correction is necessary, never do it only because he deserves it. Discipline your child because he needs correction, not because you need the satisfaction of getting back at him.

3. Never discipline a child in a way that belittles, shames, or embarrasses him.

4. Never discipline on a whim. Be consistent, be very consistent. Poor discipline is unpredictable. Sometimes a child makes one mistake and judgment falls down upon him-he finds himself grounded for six months. Next time, he may do something really wrong, four times as bad, and you say, "Oh, that's the funniest thing I've ever seen. You know, I did the same thing when I was growing up." The mind of the child begins to believe that the little mistakes are really wrong, but the big mistakes are terribly funny.

"MSN" - update

"msn" is one of my favourite site where I can usually do check my "sports update", and where I can go for my "sports chat".

On their front page there is this article I found entitled " 7 Crucial Parenting Mitakes to avoid", sounds very interesting so I went over and read the whole article --- quite true that being a parents is not an easy task or responsibility (though I am not a parent yet) but since I grew up in a Christian family, I am so blessed to have a parent who's been there very supportive and very loving parent --- very disciplinarian that I can say, "It's worth it."

In my next post, I have this article written about " Shaping Your Child with Positive discipline".

But for now here is the article from "msn" as I've mentioned.


7 Crucial Parenting Mistakes to Avoid

Top parenting pros share some of their worst goofs -- and show how moms and dads can turn their mistakes into the best lessons of all.

Guess what, parents? You're not perfect. Even the most dedicated and insightful moms and dads make mistakes when it comes to raising kids.

The good news is that kids, and families in general, are resilient. You can't erase your worst parenting moments, but with a little bit of insight and introspection, you can keep from repeating them and can use those experiences to the benefit of everyone in the family.
Even parenting pros admit that they have moments when they wish they could have hit rewind on their parental performances.

"Experts are not perfect, and we're certainly not perfect parents," says Dr. Donald Shifrin, a Bellevue, Washington, pediatrician. The examples those parenting pros share openly here can help you handle mom-and-dad mistakes better. And they illustrate an important element in fixing a mistake: Own up to it. You won't be diminished in your kids' eyes. In fact, they will respect you for learning from your errors.

Find Your Temper -- Before You Lose It

When Shifrin's son Max refused to obey his dad, preferring to concentrate on his handheld GameBoy, the chairman of the public education committee of the American Academy of Pediatrics lost his cool.

"I yelled, 'If you're not going to do any of the things I asked, you're not going to have this thing," and with an Olympic toss hurled the GameBoy out a second-story window. It landed in the bushes, and took me about 20 minutes to find it," he says.

That day, Shifrin learned the hard way how counterproductive it can be to go ballistic on your kids, even if they sometimes seem to deserve it.

"Max had this horrified look on his face and lost track of everything I was trying to explain. Instead, there was wailing, moaning, and teeth-gnashing, and the focus was on what Dad had done," Shifrin recalls. "It's not good for children to see us solve problems that way. Now I'll say, 'I'm thinking of swearing. Things are bad now,' and Max knows I'm at the end of my rope."


Learn to Talk "The Talk"

Sooner or later, it happens. Out of the blue, your child asks, "Where do babies come from?" And though it's the same question you asked as a kid, you'll likely be as unprepared for it as your parents probably were.

"When my 8-year-old daughter, Sarah, asked the question at the dinner table one night, I launched into a pretty detailed discussion about reproduction and sexuality," recalls Daniel Hoover, PhD, child clinical psychologist at The Menninger Clinic, Houston, and associate professor in the department of psychiatry at Baylor College of Medicine. "Sarah started to get more and more troubled-looking as I continued talking. Then she began crying and yelled out, 'That's not true,' and ran from the room."

The take away message: On sensitive topics like sex, you probably don't have to go into nearly as much detail as you think you do. Try to edit your response to fit the age of your child. And remember that no matter how prepared you are, you're probably not going to get the Sex Talk right, says Hoover. Half the battle, though, is admitting that this is an awkward topic, and apologizing in advance if you mess up.

"I doubt my daughter's scarred for life because of our talk, though when she has her own children, she'll probably take the exact opposite approach when it comes to talking about sex -- and probably get it wrong somehow too," says Hoover.

Plan Around Her Personality -- Not Yours

"I threw my introverted 10-year-old daughter a surprise birthday party and she was mortified when faced with a roomful of people," says Sally Beisser, associate professor of education at Drake University in Des Moines, Iowa. Calling herself "a classic extrovert," Beisser threw the kind of party she would have loved when she was 10.

"But you need to consider your child's personality, not your own. She would've been much happier if she'd planned the party. That was a mistake I never made again. As I like to say, parenting is the only profession that, by the time you're really good at it, you retire," Beisser says.

Avoid Becoming a Daddy Doormat.

Setting limits is a critical job for any parent. Remembering to enforce those limits isn't easy, but don't worry: Your kids will remind you.

"After I told my daughter we'd only buy the things we needed at the store, I let her add this and that to our bill. When we got to the car she said, 'You were really easy. I expected you to say no.' It dawned on me that I had become an easy mark for her," says Gary Hill, a family therapist and clinical services director at The Family Institute at Northwestern University in Chicago.
"After that, every store we went to, she'd ask for things. Finally, I had to sit her down and apologize, telling her from then on, I'd be more consistent. She got the message and was fine with it. You've got to be ever vigilant. If you set a limit with your kids, you simply have to follow through. Otherwise, you end up reinforcing the very behavior you're trying to get rid of," Hill says.

Focus on Security -- Not Scare Tactics

Instilling respect for Mom's rules is important, but sometimes, in moments of haste, parents accidentally instill fear instead.

"I was really frustrated because my 4-year-old son, David, was dawdling and wouldn't get with my schedule for getting in the car. Before I could stop myself, I asked him, 'Are you sure you want to stay inside this house by yourself, with all those bogeys under your bed?'" says Geri Pearson, assistant psychiatry professor at the University of Connecticut Health Center in Farmington.

Of course, the scare tactic backfired, leaving Pearson with a first-class case of guilt and a fair bit of damage control to do. "I felt awful for implying the things he imagined were actually real. Then we 'swept' the bogeys away. Of course, I also had to reassure him again and again that he was safe. I realized it was more important that he feel secure than we get out the door on time," Pearson says.

Get All the Facts First

It's only natural to defend your child if he's been accused of wrongdoing. But like you, your child makes mistakes too, and it's important to get the whole story before you decide how to respond.

"I self-righteously chewed out the school nurse when she called me to say my 10-year-old son had sent her daughter an inappropriate e-mail. When he told me at first he hadn't, I believed him. It turned out he had," says Roni Cohen-Sandler, clinical psychologist in Weston, Connecticut, and author of Trust Me Mom, Everyone Else is Going. "You shouldn't be so sure that your kids would never do anything wrong. Sometimes they act out of character, so you shouldn't automatically defend them."

Even though her son hadn't known what the word he'd written meant, Cohen-Sandler took away his Internet privileges for lying. "Today computers are his life. He learned to be very careful about what he writes," she says. "And to be honest from the start."

Watch Your Mouth

Kids hear everything you say, and nothing makes an impact like a parent's slip of the tongue.

Tired

I am a little bit tired today. I am at work right now - and the weather here in Vancouver is so gorgeous, I wish I could take a day off and enjoy the outside sunny weather and go for grouse grind (hiking) or do some running or maybe do some golf ha?

Even I'm tired and feel overwhelmed. Thinking about the spiritual battles I will face each day. With all His grace I am blessed as I know that God always giving me the strength that I need in order to reach my goal today--- able to accomplish all the works as I walk a mile with pleasure.

Thank you Lord for the wonderful day as I can enjoy the pleasure today and walk with you.

Praise be to God!!!

Obeying God

On this long trip of journey as Christian, I sometimes started wondering if I going to the right way. Or Am I following the Lord'swill? Though God may reveal His plan to me, and the steps on achieving it aren't always obvious. I only have this small knowledge to understand everything that God wants to reveal for me.

As a Christian, I travel along a path of obedience, though, most likely experience conflict. It challenge me this, sometimes what I think or what I want is contrary to God's plan, or I could say, there is a conflict between God's values and in my own little world.To learn this obedience requires moving ahead of God's signal, even when every detail is not clear.

Romans 13:1 Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. Forthere is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God.

I asked this again to myself, "How can I obey God?" how would I know about obedience? Should I keep on silence and let Him speak? And will see what happen?

I believe that a life of obedience requires learning total submission to God, and His way is perfect. We are to surrender our desires to His, even when we do not understand or when the cost seems high to achieve. Also requires willingness to accept divine chastisement. Though, no one here lives a perfect life---and we go off course daily but I do believe that God will discipline us in order to turn us back toward Him.

Hebrews 12:6 For whom the Lord loveth he chasteneth, and scourge the very son whom he receiveth.

Hebrews 12:7 If ye endure chastening, God dealeth with you as with sons; for what son is he whom the father chasteneth not?

Obeying God is not required of doing sort of exorcism, fasting or any kind of practices that not pleases God. But obeying God is tied closely to living obedient lives in meditating upon the Word of God.

Meditating means reading the Scriptures and asking ourselves this:

"What do these verses teach me about God or myself? Is there any example to follow or to avoid? Is this a command, a promise, or a warning that I need to understand it and to apply? What action do I need take to align my life with this Truth?"

Psalms 119:15 I will meditate in thy precepts, and have respect unto thy ways.

Acts 5:29 Then Peter and the other apostles answered and said, We ought to obey God rather than men.

Everyone knows you
As a man of honor
I am glad to know you
Simply as a friend

You've always taken
Time to be my brother
And I'll be standing by you in the end

But I will never put you on a pedestal
I thank the Lord for everything you do
I'll be there to pray for you and for the ones you love
I believe that He will finish all He's started in you

I will be an open
Door that you can count on
Anywhere you are
Anywhere you've been
I will be an honest

Heart you can depend on
I will be your faithful friend.

I am one of many
Whose path has been made clearer
By the light you've carried faithfully
As a warrior and a child God has used you greatly
To encourage and inspire
You've remained a true friend all the while

So I will never put you on a pedestal
Cause we both know all the glory is the Lord's
And I'll be there to pray that He will keep you by His grace
And I always will remind you to be seeking His face

I will be an open
Door that you can count on
Anywhere you are
Anywhere you've been
I will be an honest Heart you can depend on
I will be a faithful friend

Should it ever come your time to mourn
I will weep with you
And every single time you win I'm celebrating, too

Oh, I will celebrate with you

I will be an open
Door that you can count on
Anywhere you are
Anywhere you've been

I will be an honest
Heart you can depend on

I will be a faithful friend
I will be faithful
I will be a faithful friend.

~~~

So that he is more than a friend, even a brother that helps in time of adversity.

~

Proverbs 17:17 A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

The truth beyond Love

I remember when I was in University; I really do love to read books not Christian's books ha! but books that will make me "kilig" (excite) ---books about romance, about dating. These books I read from my young age, it gave me a real good impression about love which I thought that's the real meaning of the term "love". But to be honest, I didn't even know what the true meaning of love is?

During that time, all I know when you say love---for me it is something that you could give it away and let it go without knowing the meaning of it. Love that can be something to be selfish sometimes---something that you could give it up with your entire life so people can make them happy and make them satisfy. Love can be material or immaterial ---and thats all about it.

For sure many of you have their own different meaning of love too.

Now, as a Christian, one of the journeys - this commandment always telling me that `Give your love as much you could without any condition and without measuring it and without any doubt.

I asked myself this "what is the truth about love then?

As other's definition, "love", it has been said, is the universal language. It is extolled everywhere, by everyone, as the pinnacle of virtue---but what the world needs now? You may hear all these different singers who sang about love---the Beatles claimed from one of their song "All you need is love." – Michael Bolton contended from his song title, "Love is a wonderful thing". These titles of songs are so beautiful to hear it, of course, a wonderful thing.

But why? Why love is a virtue?

If I remember, in the Bible, a Rabbi once posed a question to Jesus that many rabbis him had debated. "Teacher," he said, "which is the greatest commandment in the Law?""Love the Lord your God," Jesus answered, "with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." This is the first and greatest commandment --- and the second is "Love your neighbour as yourself" --- you'll find this in Matthew chapter 22 I believed.

The greatest precept of law, according to Jesus, is the command oflove. He even went so far as to say, "Love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you, that you may sons of your Father in heaven" Matthew 5:44-45.

The whole book of New Testament is telling us all about "love" and the percept is very clear ---for God, for families, for our neighbours, even for our enemies --- is commanded. This is the true message we have ever heard from the beginning.

These commands point to a principle too--- love for God and love for others. Regardless of whether a specific precept addresses a certain decision or behaviour, the principle of love for God and others dictates whether our actions are right or wrong, coz love is a principle God values. Ultimately, of course, love is a true virtue not simply it is commanded, nor even coz it is a principle God values, but coz God is like that --- and God is love. Other people may not understand the true meaning of this, but this meaning directed to the person of God himself. I do believe that this is the area that I need to look upeveryday "to love" --- doesn't matter who I deal with everyday.

1 John 4:16 And we have known and believed the love that God hath tous. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, andGod in him.

He loves us so much "with an everlasting love"Jeremiah 31:3 The LORD hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.

He loves us so much that He gave His son to die for us.

John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

He loves us so much, while we were still sinners --- while we still committing sin --- displaying enmity towards God and Christ died for us.

Romans 5:8 But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while wewere yet sinners, Christ died for us.

He is the kind of God who continues to love us even those who curse Him, who mock Him, coz love is one of His nature --- It is not something He does, but it is something He is. There can be no way of disputing the fact that love is a virtue, coz the test of Truth grounds love in the nature and character of God --- and we can always then say that "love of God and others is right – for all people, for all times, and for all places.

I can say that the more we love, the more we see the true meaning of love not just we want to be loved or we loved coz we are attracted to that person --- we love coz we see the true meaning of this through Jesus Christ. He is the beginning of love.

John 15:12 This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you.

_______

Note: this message is also posted in our e-group "The Equipping Christians Group"

Camp Stories

Summer Camp 2005 "Teens" (20th Anniversary)

Our church here in Vancouver, British Columbia just had the teens summer camp week from July 18 to 22. It was a blessing for me to hear their testimony. They really had a good time with the Lord. Here are some stories...

Camper: We are going home tomorrow. Guess I'd better rumple up my panjamas and squeeze out of halp of my toothpaste."

A New York youngster, who was more accustomed to man-made wonders than the marvels of nature, went off to summer camp for the first time. There he saw his first rainbow. The attitude of the child, as he gazed upon the gorgeous display of the colours in the sky, was one of wonder and perflexity. He finally exclaimed to this counselor, "it's very beautiful, but what is it supposed to advertise?"

By what do we gauge a successful camp program? that the camper goes home to enthusiastically report on the really great counselor, the good food, or the number of badges he has own? or by a quietly spoken statement: "Mom, I met Jesus Christ while I was camp".

The great evangelist D. L. Moody was once asked, "How many converts did you have last night?" one teen answered, "Two and one half." --- You mean two adults and a child? "No", he replied. "Two children and one adult."

A child converted is a whole life converted to Jesus.

What a blessing!